B: yogurt-120 (at 8:00 AM)
L: rice cake-45; cutie mandarin-40 (at 12:00 PM)
D: soup-160 (as 4:00 PM)
Total: 365.
Bicycling for almost an hour, so I'll burn most of it off.
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Clocks.
I can't wait until I can listen to Clocks by Coldplay, get up and start dancing and actually look pretty. I makes me want to float away, and I can't wait until I actually can.
Goals.
SW:180 ish
CW: 140
LW:134
GW 1: 135
GW 2: 130-go shopping
GW 3: 125
GW 4: 120
GW 5: 115- shopping again
GW 6: 110-get nails done
GW 7: 105-get hair done
UGW: 100-shopping
Lets see how long this takes... if I can make it past easter weekend, I'm pretty sure that I can do this by the end of summer, if not earlier... I just want to be able to have fun during the last summer of highschool.
CW: 140
LW:134
GW 1: 135
GW 2: 130-go shopping
GW 3: 125
GW 4: 120
GW 5: 115- shopping again
GW 6: 110-get nails done
GW 7: 105-get hair done
UGW: 100-shopping
Lets see how long this takes... if I can make it past easter weekend, I'm pretty sure that I can do this by the end of summer, if not earlier... I just want to be able to have fun during the last summer of highschool.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Crackers.
Sadly, I've found my new weakness- saltine crackers. Not just any crackers, but the cheap, flaky ones that my step mom buys. I. Love. Them. Sadly, they don't fill me up worth a SHIT. I just eat and eat and eat, and I think it's okay because they're just crackers. But they aren't just crackers, they are fat and carbs coated in sodium and more fat. I still eat them, though.
Consumed
peanut butter crackers: 190
grapes- 14
crackers- (12 cals each): 120
pineapple- 60
soup- 30 cals
pretzel rod- 30
total- 444
Burned
One hour on bike with dad. : minus about 563 calories.
OFFICIAL TOTAL- negative 119
I still feel like shit. I'm probably going to go and eat a few more crackers and drink some water, beacause right now I feel like shit. I've gained weight. Like, a ridiculous amount. Ten pounds, I think. I look disgusting. It's because I binge, ALL THE TIME. I always have to finish what's on my plate. I can never just get one of anything. I'm pretty sure that one of these days I'm going to get sick from dehydration, because when I restrict, drinking repulses me. I don't know why. I'm forcing myself to drink water now, and it's just... gross. I can' explain it. It tastes like the lotion I have on, and I hate it. I'm going to restrict below 500 calories a day from now through summer. If I was sucessful, I bet I could lose thirty or more pounds That would be like a dream come tru. I haven't been below 130 since I was in sixth grade. It'll be pretty emotional for me. My goal weight is to be 140 by the end of April. That'll be my birthday, and even though thats still pretty big, it's better than nothing. This is what I get or fucking up so much. I honestly could care less about whatever food I did or did not eat a week go. That's all I have to keep telling myself. This too shall pass. If I just sit here and ignore my crvings, ths too shall pass. It'sll all about cntrol, which I've always failed at miserably. Hopfully I'll stop breaking my own heart, and this time will be the time that changes everything. </3
Consumed
peanut butter crackers: 190
grapes- 14
crackers- (12 cals each): 120
pineapple- 60
soup- 30 cals
pretzel rod- 30
total- 444
Burned
One hour on bike with dad. : minus about 563 calories.
OFFICIAL TOTAL- negative 119
I still feel like shit. I'm probably going to go and eat a few more crackers and drink some water, beacause right now I feel like shit. I've gained weight. Like, a ridiculous amount. Ten pounds, I think. I look disgusting. It's because I binge, ALL THE TIME. I always have to finish what's on my plate. I can never just get one of anything. I'm pretty sure that one of these days I'm going to get sick from dehydration, because when I restrict, drinking repulses me. I don't know why. I'm forcing myself to drink water now, and it's just... gross. I can' explain it. It tastes like the lotion I have on, and I hate it. I'm going to restrict below 500 calories a day from now through summer. If I was sucessful, I bet I could lose thirty or more pounds That would be like a dream come tru. I haven't been below 130 since I was in sixth grade. It'll be pretty emotional for me. My goal weight is to be 140 by the end of April. That'll be my birthday, and even though thats still pretty big, it's better than nothing. This is what I get or fucking up so much. I honestly could care less about whatever food I did or did not eat a week go. That's all I have to keep telling myself. This too shall pass. If I just sit here and ignore my crvings, ths too shall pass. It'sll all about cntrol, which I've always failed at miserably. Hopfully I'll stop breaking my own heart, and this time will be the time that changes everything. </3
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)